Gap of Grace: Present to an Intentional Pause

angel-wings

You think and feel you’re alone…
then you look up and see Angel Wings…
and you remember who you are and where you came from and what is possible,
if you can simply hold on to hope and breathe through this moment…

I was walking along Ocean’s Edge, under Half Moon…. feeling incredibly alone, disheartened and discouraged.

evening-walk-11-10

I had manifested external energy that coursed through my peaceful life, enlivening my senses yet, was also rubbing right up against my internal blocks…amplifying friction and tension while testing everything I hold dear.

I found myself up against a wall of conditioning….observing for understanding as both sacred pieces and residual barriers fell away.

I chose not to cling (even though my mind asked me to) but, instead,  to open my hands and my heart to honor an intentional “pause”.  

I resisted the urge (reaction) to rush to pick up each piece and quickly put them back together and I left it all there, waiting patiently, intentionally, for the energy to completely unfold (creation).

I promised my self I would keep my heart open, leaning into this space, even if it was sensitive and the outcome was uncertain.

I experienced some of the most painful and some of the most joyful moments of my life. There comes a moment where one is in so much pain that fear dissipates (for how could anything *be worse* “than this”?) *and* there comes a moment where one is in such bliss that fear dissipates (for how could anything *be better* “than this”?).

As I walked, I looked up to sky…and I breathed it all in…the remembrance of who I am…far more than what is contained within my skin…

…in the almost darkness of twilight, the landscape I love glittered. I felt the presence of something bigger than I…hope, possibility.  

External remained the same but, from that moment on, I stopped resisting the experience.  

I chose to invite the energy of grace into each space…the “perfect” ones; the “ultra-messy/imperfect” ones.

In these moments of now–as I write this today–I am not who I was, nor have I become “who I aspire to be”…I am here, smack dab in the gap of grace. 

I don’t have “the” answers, but I no longer need them; for, my heart is open, here, now, right where I am.

And, that, my friends is the gift of grace…*the miracle*…all else – anything I ‘gained’, anything I ‘lost’ pales in comparison. 

As I write this, Matthew Schuler is singing Hallelujah on The Voice (the ultimate ‘grace song’…what a sign of affirmation!).

 We are so quick to judge, to label, to numb, to advise, to bury, to criticize, to restrict….

…how quick are we to open our heart, especially in a space of that which we don’t understand or particularly enjoy the feeling of…..

Is there currently a space in your life where you might invite the energy of grace in? I know with the end-of-year preparations and holidays coming, there might be a few spaces asking for grace…(when you share, we learn!)

Much peace and abundant love,

Joy

I have been intentionally quiet in this space.  I thank you for your patience and understanding as I took (am still taking) the time to apply my practices of presence to this heart opening.  I greatly appreciate, and graciously receive, all of the energy and prayers that have been sent!

The next session of the Gap of Grace begins November 17 and runs through November 30.  I am very much looking forward to this particular session!  Pre -registration (with a 20% discount) is open now through November 13, 2013; registration at full cost is open through November 19, 2013. 

Related Posts:

Comments on: "Gap of Grace: Present to an Intentional Pause" (6)

  1. HI Joy,

    I can totally relate to this passage of yours. “In these moments of now–as I write this today–I am not who I was, nor have I become “who I aspire to be”…I am here, smack dab in the gap of grace.”

    I’m there too, I’m not where I was, but it feels like I’m still very far from where I want to be. I’m somewhere in the middle and the middle feels like an awfully long road.

    It has been an exhausting year, but for the grace of God, I’m/we are still here, moving forward, getting stronger, getting smarter, and living with more love.

    Thank you for your words and lessons!

    • Thank you for sharing, Mignon. I know there are many whom identify with your words.

      You capture the essence of the gap of grace in these words “it has been an exhausting year [..] we are still here, moving forward”. So many people feel and succumb to that energy of exhaustion, forgetting that there is a choice to tap into/surrender to positive energy and allow that to be the current that moves them forward.

      I think when we share our stories of being in the gap and how we are choosing to “be” while we are in it, others also feel comfortable considering moving through it instead of “staying stuck”.

      I appreciate your willingness to share here in this space, from a vulnerable space in your life…your words inspire me today, as I open my heart to create and connect while in another day of uncertainty. Thank you!

  2. Dearest Joy, your beautiful words truly moved me today. Used to be I disliked being in any gap, be it filled with grace or not. It wasn’t comfortable and I like my comfort. But I have learned to embrace this space, because in it I’ve discovered all things are possible.

    So now I surrender in peace, with the expectation that wonderful things are happening for me, even though I can only see through a glass darkly. I wait for the inevitable light that always appears, often when I’m least expecting it.

    • Thank you, Elle, for your presence to this particular message. I love your energy and the way you choose to create, connect and move through world, so I find your words incredibly inspiring and encouraging.

      I used to be a “leaper” and I would intentionally jump over the gap space, so I understand your previous dislike.

      This *I have learned to embrace this space, because in it I have discovered all things are possible.” speaks right to my heart. When I used to leap, I would miss the feel of trust in the process and the possibilities that were there waiting patiently to be discovered and celebrated. I am learning to breathe through this discomfort and open my heart in the moments it really wishes to close (for protection and healing).

      This *I surrender in peace, with the expectation that wonderful things are happening for me* is powerful and empowering. Thank you!

      It is also my current lesson and challenge…learning how to center into peace when mind (and often others looking in) say not possible, won’t happen, can’t work. I let each thought completely unfold…holding space for it all…as I breathe in gratitude…eventually utter peace is experienced, regardless of external and that peace brings the ability to see and feel the new possibility (I’m not quite there yet, but I am working on it!).

      Thank you again for you precious words. I hear, and am applying, each one!

  3. Hi Joy,

    I missed *you* so decided to check in on your heart space on the web, though I’ve been de-webifying my life more of late…and here, always relevant, always connected, I find the reflections of my current experiences – in one way or another through your words and your photos and what you share. A beautiful way to connect again to both you and me- and I find, more and more, it’s about the containers we use to make things sacred- more than the type or form of communication, or even the message- relationship(s) is a container for our self-expression reflected back to us…in ways both bold and subtle; in ways both thrilling and enlivening, and peaceful and calming. Somehow you are able to embody both these paradoxical elements in one space/ in one body… It’s really quite a beautiful thing.

    And I love your ocean pictures, as always…

    Molly

    • Wow, Molly…that this experience brought your “presence” and energy back to my Facets space is quite a blessing, thank you! For to me, you symbolize living life with passion and moxie and spunk, with a heart-wide open to love and be loved…a reminder to live it, not simply write it or reflect it, but to live it with all that I am/we are…So, thank you!

      As you know, I love the idea of sacred containers…I consistently focus upon setting my heart, my Facets space and my home with the energy of sacred containers…I am not expanding that to include the bubble of personal space around me as I move through World and my actual physical body….

      I absolutely agree about allowing our creative expressions to evolve (something I hadn’t allowed or entertained much of in the last year, but am exploring and experimenting with now–thank you for that reminder and affirmation!).

      Thank you for the kind words…my heart is open to graciously receiving them in…and to returning that energy back into your life in ways that *you* can receive well….

      Thank you!

Please share your voice: "Gap of Grace: Present to an Intentional Pause"

When you share, we learn!