I took this photo during a morning beach walk earlier today. This is with no-filter or editing – that vibrant blue is a gift from Mother Nature!
I am always open to understanding the meaning in things. I find it incredibly interesting that my last post, dated April 9, 2016, opened with a photo of a very cloudy beach and this one, today, is crystal clear. This is a great visual of my heart journey over the past several weeks!
Each time something would happen in a day and I’d think about writing; for a myriad of reasons I didn’t. While this is the longest span I haven’t written since my first blog from my sailboat around 2010, I did my best to hold space for unfolding, knowing when I was meant to share publicly here (I’ve been on social media intermittently over the last several weeks), it would simply flow. And, here I am.
In the practice of unfolding, trust is essential. Your heart might request a specific step or direction while your mind might say ‘it isn’t logical, it isn’t right and/or no one does this in this way’ and perhaps even ‘this is what you will lose if you follow your heart’.
The way I build trust, while following my heart path, is to center into source connection, encourage myself with words, then take that step and thank myself for taking it.
With each step, my mind then has ‘proof’, because: I feel peaceful, joyful; an energetic or physical door opens; wonderful blessings are perfectly placed; amazing synchronicity is experienced; fullness of connection happens in a way I couldn’t have planned.
With this ‘proof’, my mind is more at ease when I listen to my heart.
This way of building trust is something I support each coaching client through. I can customize tools, reflect possibility and offer clarity, but the only way to build this trust is to take that step.
Deep, strong trust in the process of unfolding is a practice of presence that I’ve built the foundation for over the last decade, and has now become very natural, my way of being. It took time, patience and lots of determination to live a way different from what I’d known.
Still, it doesn’t make times like this past month ‘easier’, because each step requires attention, intention, presence. That’s a choice I make, and continue to commit to, as I step into newness (which happens pretty consistently on my heart path!).
Let’s back up for a moment. What if the step doesn’t feel great or ‘right’ (meaning aligned or resonant)?
I center into source connection, so whatever I choose in that moment is a response, not a reaction. If it feels very clearly, strongly non-resonant, I remove my presence, sharply and quickly; then I do the work to understand and evaluate the dynamics and variables. If it feels slightly non-resonant, I might stay in the variables to understand them more and turn inquiry inward to understand what my inner block might be or what the message in the variables is, then make a choice from there.
I also do my best not to judge or criticize myself or my step; instead loving and appreciating myself while making a new choice.
I find that making choices from a centered space of love, feeling supported and appreciated, helps me to make ‘better’ (meaning more aligned and on-purpose) choices with more ease and grace.
Again, that’s a practice that I’ve built over time – mainly because I wish to live in peace and joy and I find moving from a space of, and with, love ensures that peace and joy are consistent – regardless of external variables.
That’s what I’ve been focusing on these past weeks as I healed from my first surgery and began prepping in all ways to hold space for a June full of many ‘milestone moments’ for both of my kids. I’m also postponing my next surgery so I can be fully present to myself and to mothering as June unfolds. This feels great in all ways, for which I’m glad! That depth of clarity is a direct result of taking the time to do inner work and allow healing for my body and being this past month.
I’d like to share another photo with you from today’s beach walk:
The Full Moon woke me this morning at 3am. I peeked out the window to look at her radiance and I could see the ocean was lit-up with moonbeams! It looked glorious *and* was also far too chilly and too ‘less than safe’ for me to go out there at that hour. I did invite Full Moon’s magic and beauty into each area of my life as I thanked her for waking me, and was also reminded to intentionally release some stuff (as Full Moon invites us to do each month).
However, after a few hours passed, right after sunrise, I felt drawn to walk to this bird sanctuary tucked behind one of my favorite stretches of beach. I haven’t been in months, and I then dared myself to walk far beyond this to the power plant – which was a 90-minute walk. It’s the most physically strenuous thing I’ve done since being diagnosed last September. But, I’ve been stretching so much energetically that my body wanted this physical exertion, so I honored that.
This space is special to me – it’s one I visited long-ago with an ex who was dear to my heart and I remember sharing that energy, together, and feeling so blessed; then healing from that loss, and still feeling blessed.
A few years later, a soul sister friend who lived a country away, used to share photos of herself at ‘her marsh’ which prompted me to return to this space to share photos of myself here, with her (and a photo group we were in).
I was thinking of them both recently (maybe as part of Mercury Retrograde review?) and wondering what they would both tell me with regards to some questions I have about a stretch I just did (and am doing). I’m releasing some energetic chains that have bound me my entire life, which ultimately is a great thing but I also feel incredibly vulnerable and am at my personal edge while being present to this release. Also, it’s been a year this month that my soul sister friend died and perhaps she was gently nudging me to return to this space.
I was surprised to find that this area has changed. There was a lot of work on the beach, and it looks like part of that was to remove the tall reeds and thick bushes lining this area – there were more construction truck tracks than bird tracks! I saw a variety of birds so maybe they’ve adapted to this change. It’s still quite beautiful, so I chose to tap into that.
My intention is to understand how to keep my heart open to celebrate the gift of this moment – even with loss and death (energetic and physical). Even with change one didn’t ask for and isn’t quite sure how to hold space for the unfolding of. Even with change one greatly desires but is a huge stretch. Even when so many in world choose a different way.
I don’t have a photo to share, but on my way back from the power plant, I passed this spot again – as a reference, I was standing in the sand between the beach of the first photo and the sanctuary of the second.
On my left, by the beach, were two huge turkey vultures; while, on my right, a beautiful heron was standing in the shallow water of the sanctuary, preening her (or him) self. Whoa!!
Turkey vultures are about picking out the pieces from death that can nourish you (maybe for humans this is learning lessons, finding the love connection). Herons are about your inner most truth.
I had this very clear thought, while standing between them, on this Full Moon day, very centered and open, the invitation is to release thoughts and resources that create doubt that shadows our ability to listen to, and live, our heart truth.
What ‘has to die’ in order for you and I to live fully? Self-doubt, settling for non-resonance, vesting presence to stuff that dilutes passion and undermines confidence, judgment, being too busy to connect to source energy (and whatever else comes to mind for you as you feel into this invitation).
I feel this particular ex would say: remember that you have magic at your fingertips and you are far stronger and more capable than you think you are. While my soul sister friend would say: the beauty that you see is your reflection, instead of hiding it, celebrate it and share it through your expressions.
Overall it feels like a reminder that I’m gifted life in this moment, so treasure that, as I live it, and allow everything in my experience to be ‘good’/full of ‘goodness’.
I also feel this vibrant blue showing in the photos today is an invitation from throat chakra to express your inner knowing and to honor it with whatever you choose to create in your life (from the meals you prepare, to the words you choose, to the artistic expressions you share).
As always, dear reader, I thank you for reading what my heart has asked me to share. I’m glad to be ‘back’ and I’m glad you held space for my return and are here to welcome me!
As you feel into the energy of my photos and words, what arises within for you? If you choose to interpret the meaning of the vultures and heron, what message do you receive? (when you share, you inspire).
Much peace and abundant love,
I am delighted to facilitate the next session of Celebrating Daily Magic: 30-Day Photo Journey which opens June 18th and runs through July 17th! Each daily prompt will include one poem from an author of my choosing and students also share their favorite poems for me to include in the class prompts, with the invitation to explore different facets of heart energy through photo and word.
One of the ‘benefits’ from this ecourse that I couldn’t have planned, but sure feels like a blessing, is the heart connection that flows through as each person shares glimpses of their world along with thoughts from their heart. Please do join in!